Introduction

The Internal Complaints Committee (ICC) organised a webinar on March 20, 2021, to address the issue of sexual harassment in an academic institution. Prof. Meghana Tare began the talk by saying, ‘Sexual harassment is an under-recognised global epidemic and unfortunately, it impacts not only the individual but the entire organisation or society in several ways.’ 

Prof. Sudhirkumar Barai, Director, BITS Pilani, Pilani Campus, gave the welcome address. He talked about how BITS Pilani has a zero-tolerance policy regarding issues of sexual harassment and that the Institute believes in respecting diversity among its students. He said that the ‘ultimate freedom’ students get when they join college after years of rigorous studies can lead to ‘diversions’. Furthermore, he added that higher degree and PhD students work closely with professors and faculty. This can lead to potentially unforeseen situations for all the parties involved. He emphasised that this issue is not restricted to impacting only women and stressed that ‘instead of telling girls how to behave, I think it’s very, very important that we tell our boys how to behave.’ His address ended on the importance of creating societally conscious and responsible students in the Institution.

Prof. Surekha Bhanot, Presiding Officer, then provided a brief overview of the ICC’s activities and introduced the guest speaker, Prof. Nivedita Menon. As per her website, Prof. Menon has been teaching at the Center for Comparative Politics and Political Theory, School of International Studies, JNU since 2008. She has more than 30 years of experience in teaching and has received the AK Ramanujan Award for translation from Hindi and Malayalam into English (instituted by Katha). 

Sexual Harassment, Consent, and Agency

‘Some women could find the experience so alienating that they would come to believe that there is something wrong with them for not finding it funny.’

Prof. Menon, on the practice of students making ranked lists of their female peers, based on their appearance

Prof. Menon began her speech by congratulating the ICC for taking the issue of sexual harassment seriously and holding sessions to address it. She said that the term “sexual harassment” has not always been a part of mainstream language. ‘It doesn’t simply exist in the English language. It was produced out of feminist politics.’ She added that women’s struggles, or rather, the struggles of any minority, tend to be overlooked. Some marginalised communities struggle to find words in mainstream language to express their pain. Therefore, it is necessary to come up with new terms to adequately describe it. In the past, “eve-teasing” was used to describe inappropriate advances towards women. This term fails to convey the severity of the matter. ‘There is a kind of very powerful heterosexist narrative which constructs romance as something in which the man must pursue and beat down the woman’s defences,’ she said. Additionally, she said that Indian cinema in all languages completely legitimises this as a mode of romance. She also brought up the idea that sexual harassment is not socially accepted. ‘You will actually find it difficult to find someone saying that harassing women is okay,’ Prof. Menon said. She explained how harassment is often sidelined by people who justify harassment as ‘fun’ or by those who place the blame on the woman’s behaviour or attire. The term “sexual harassment” displays that inappropriate behaviour, usually from males towards females, is violent. It is objectifying and threatening; in no circumstance should it be treated as a minor issue.

One form of sexual harassment that Prof. Menon elaborated upon was the practice of male college students making lists of their female peers, ranking them on their body parts. ‘This is treated as fun, it is even treated as a compliment to the women who are being ranked this way,’ she stated. Her objection to this was that it creates a hostile work environment. She talked about how female students feel aware of the fact that they are being assessed by their male peers at all times, and questioned how any woman could feel comfortable in such an environment. Some women could find the experience so alienating that they would come to believe that there is something wrong with them for not finding it funny. She talked about how it gets worse when women learn to participate and be a ‘good sport’ about it. ‘To participate in the process of demeaning yourself and humiliating yourself, there is that pressure and the punishment if you do not participate is that you are completely marginalised. You’re still objectified, but you are marginalised, made to feel as if there’s something wrong with you,’ she said.

Leading into attraction and romance, Prof. Menon introduced two more terms: “consent” and “agency”. She stated that consent dictates that if one is romantically interested in someone, it is essential that one approaches them politely. Furthermore, if one’s advances are rejected, one is not entitled to a reason as to why. She explained that consent means that a person’s verbal agreement is absolutely necessary before engaging in any sort of romantic or sexual activity. Prof. Menon defined “agency” as the right to one’s bodily integrity. This means that everyone has ownership over their own bodies and the right to choose what they do with them. She stated that asking repeatedly after being denied or ‘being put on a list’ is violating another’s consent and agency.

Prof. Menon said that sexual harassment in academia includes a lot of factors. ‘There is a certain normalisation of particular kinds of behaviour in patriarchal society, and the term sexual harassment is meant to explode that normality,’ she stated. Prof. Menon believes that an academic community has a responsibility to ‘build new worlds’. 

She sees academic spaces as an environment unlike any other—‘I very severely distrust familial ideology in an academic institution,’ she said. She discussed how the ‘hierarchy’ between students and faculty is starkly different from that between children and their parents. Unlike in a family, there can be some form of democracy in an academic space. It is a heterogeneous community comprising people of diverse genders, castes, classes, and religions coming together. Therefore, it is essential to ‘work very hard to produce new [critical values] which will then flow out into society and transform [it].’

She stated that an institute of higher education is a place where one encounters people from different contexts and suddenly finds new freedom. Everyone there is an adult. Unlike schools, rules regarding discipline are not as rigidly enforced. Students get a sense of power, which leads to a disconnect between knowing what is appropriate and what is not.

Learning to Unlearn

‘Consent is not a one time thing.’

Prof. Menon, on harassment in a consensual relationship.

‘I think that the first thing that all of us have to continuously do, and I would say this even for myself, who is in the latter half, or latter third of my life, is that we have to be constantly prepared to unlearn,’ Prof. Menon stated. Academic institutions and cultures focus mainly on learning, but unlearning is equally important. She said that everyone has to unlearn previous certainties. This unlearning comes from peer groups, inside classrooms, interaction with heterogeneous communities, through reading, and trying to understand what political movements are saying. Teachers, too, have to be prepared to unlearn what they thought was the norm; for example, when they encounter students who do not conform to the gender binary, they have to learn to use their preferred pronouns. 

Prof. Menon said that talking about sexual harassment is a part of this process of unlearning. She stated that if someone’s behavior is pointed out to be problematic, the immediate reaction must be to take a step back and try and understand the problem. She said that it is important to engage in this process of dialogue rather than being defensive about one’s actions. ‘Your intention behind saying something may not have been hurtful, but if it is perceived as a hurt, it’s worth having a dialogue about it,’ she stated. She added that an academic community can provide a space where certain crucial conversations, which may be uncomfortable for both parties, can take place without physical or emotional violence.

Prof. Menon pointed out that sexual harassment can occur even within a consensual relationship. ‘Consent is not a one time thing,’ she said. She emphasised the importance of recognising that there are a range of genders and multiple ways in which sexual harassment can take place. It can happen between any two people regardless of their gender. She said that marital rape is being talked about because marriage is assumed to be a one-time consent for the rest of one’s life. Prof. Menon stated that that should not be the way in which consent is seen. Consent is a ‘process’ and must be renewed. A person might consent to something at one time, but then withdraw it later. 

Harassment in Academic Communities

Prof. Menon then discussed the power dynamic between students and teachers. She stated that the responsibility of maintaining a healthy environment falls on the teaching community. The teacher should not, under any circumstance, comment on the student’s looks, body, or gender, consciously or otherwise. If a student makes such a comment about their teacher, the teacher must shut it down politely. She added that she, and others who support this view, are called harsh because of it. One must keep in mind that what one thinks is a funny comment may not seem as such to others. Prof. Menon mentioned that teachers must not put pressure on students by asking for favours of any sort and using their grades or scores as leverage.

She also believes that consensual, sexual relationships between a student and a teacher can occur, provided everyone involved is a legal adult. She thinks that rather than forbidding them, strict guidelines should be imposed for such matters. It is better to create a sex-positive environment for a healthier atmosphere, she stated. No one should judge a student and teacher for being in a relationship; however, it is necessary to be mindful about the power imbalance in their situation. She proposed that such a relationship must be declared to the institute authorities. Additionally, she emphasised the teacher must not have any control over the student’s classes’ grades, so that no unfair treatment can occur.

Explaining ways of handling sexual harassment, she said that ‘coming down hard’ on any sexual or romantic relationships between adults was a sex-negative way of handling the situation, and there should be a healthy way for people to express desire or romance.

Myths About Sexual Harassment

Harassment may take place unknowingly—where the harasser thinks their behaviour is normal—or knowingly—when the harasser is exercising their power.

Prof. Menon brought up a few myths regarding sexual harassment. The first one was the belief that sexual harassment is an expression of “desire”, which is not true. Sexual harassment is an expression of power. It is an attempt to prove or showcase one’s power over someone else. The second myth she talked about was the profile people create in their minds of the offenders. There is an idea that boys of a decent upbringing do not harass women. This is not the case, as not all harassers fit the image of a criminal. Harassment may take place unknowingly—where the harasser thinks their behaviour is normal—or knowingly—when the harasser is exercising their power. ‘In this entire profile, you could have people who are just perfectly nice people, and come from good families and be very educated, but they can feel entitled to this,’ Prof. Menon said.

She spoke about how it is necessary to build a culture in academic institutions that accepts and supports complainants. People bringing up these issues should be taken seriously. She stressed that discretion must be maintained in this regard; the matter should not become public. Moreover, it should not become a part of campus politics. She stated that sexual harassment has to be challenged and the community must learn to grow tolerant and sympathetic. She encouraged dialogue and conversations about these sensitive issues.

Question and Answer Session

‘…There are also battles you want to choose to fight.’

Prof. Menon, on confronting people in different social contexts.

Prof. Meghana Tare thanked Prof. Menon for her speech and then requested members of the ICC to read out questions from the student audience. The first question came from a boy asking how to compliment girls on their clothes or appearance without making them uncomfortable. Prof. Menon responded that between close friends, his compliments would not be misunderstood and it was safe to do so. Regarding other cases, she said, ‘You can have other kinds of compliments which compliment her brain or her activity and arrive at the appearance compliments when you’re a little more comfortable in the relationship.’ She also added that if the girl seems uncomfortable, he must immediately apologise. Adding to this point, Prof. Menon mentioned that she believes that young girls should be complimented less on their looks and more on their skills. Constantly talking about appearance makes girls develop the false belief that “good” looks are crucial.

The next question was from a boy who said that girls often asked him why he was being nice to them, seeming suspicious of his nice behaviour. Prof. Menon said that he should see this as ‘a glimpse into another world’ where women have not experienced niceness. She added that this should make him aware of his privilege as he might have been taking it for granted when women were nice to him. These women may be trusting him where they do not trust other men. Prof. Menon said that he should take it as a compliment, and earn and use that trust wisely. She said that it is often difficult for ‘nice guys’ to step in and stand up for women in their peer groups. She said that he should use the experience of being trusted by women to educate other men and try to make some changes in the world.

The next question came from a student asking for practical solutions to the issues discussed. They also asked how to convince an ‘oppressor’ having a rigid attitude towards these topics. Prof. Menon started by saying that if someone was very convinced of their power and invincibility then action should be taken against them rather than convincing them. ‘Most people may not be aware of their privilege,’ she stated. Patriarchal structures normalise certain kinds of behaviour and power situations. She said that it was the job of feminists to challenge these structures. Rather than individual oppressors, she said that it is these structures that become oppressive. She said that it should be thought of as building a new culture where everyone can unlearn their privileges rather than convincing someone to look at things from a different perspective. She added that practical solutions to these problems include day-to-day conversations, as well as taking institutions like the ICC seriously. Conversations with a friend where one points out that something that they said was not okay and it is discussed are practical solutions.

The next question was by Prof. Barai, who brought up the topic of social media—particularly anonymous online confession pages and other similar forums. He talked about how students use these as a way of expressing whatever they wish to, at times with indicators pointing to a particular person. He expressed concerns that these situations may ‘become an addiction’ and possibly become dangerous. Prof. Menon said that she does not believe that it is the faculty’s place to intervene unless a specific issue or ‘confession’ is brought to their attention. If these instances are found to be inappropriate, a body of students and teachers can look further into the issue. She suggested the formation of informal committees or forums of students and teachers which could act as a ‘pre-ICC’ stage when examining reports of problematic confessions. She thinks of social media as something that is now a part of life; everyone has to ‘learn to live with it’ instead of trying to control it. She added that the anonymity of confessions does not allow any further action to be taken, but the institute may take notice of genuine-seeming cases, but confessions in general should not be acted upon.

An audience member said that at times, it becomes hard for the person being harassed to assess whether the behaviour is offensive or not. They end up overreacting or underreacting after talking about it with other people. They asked whether harassment should have set parameters or be a personal opinion. Prof. Menon said that sexual harassment does not occur in public. She declared, ‘One thing I would definitely say is not to look for conclusive proof of harassment. If there are elements of harassment in a situation, one would take that seriously and… the action that the committee decides should be taken can be modulated.’ She believes that if the harasser believes their behaviour to be normal, they should be punished in some form and given an opportunity to learn, but the committee must not look for conclusive proof.

Someone mentioned how men feel afraid to speak up about sexual harassment towards them due to fear of being undermined. They asked what girls and the community could do to solve this problem. ‘The gift that feminism has given us is that it is not one moment of change,’ Prof. Menon replied. Patriarchy is being ‘nibbled away at’ and sexual harassment as well as other issues, multiple genders, new worlds, and peer relations are being talked about. She said that everyone should try to bring about the change daily. Rather than waiting for the change to happen, she advocated for everyone to strive to be the change. 

Another person asked how to explain to a friend who is harassing someone that their behaviour is wrong. Prof. Menon said that it would be an uncomfortable conversation but a necessary one. She suggested assembling a larger group of friends to address the matter. She added that it could be a long process and ultimately lead to a broken friendship, but would be worth it for the possibility that the harasser would unlearn their behaviour.

A student described a scenario where a girl is uncomfortable with someone’s behaviour and finds it disrespectful. She raises her voice, but no one around her agrees that it was problematic behaviour. They asked how they could be taught to respect her concerns. Prof. Menon said that if the girl is alone in her struggle, she must bring the issue to a faculty member. She could also try approaching close friends who have witnessed the behaviour for support. She added that some people may have spotted this behaviour already but not spoken about it because they thought she was fine with it. The next step would be to make it a wider conversation and confront the person behaving inappropriately. However, if she cannot get any support, Prof. Menon said that she could file a formal complaint. 

The last question asked how to deal with a situation where one is not sure if the person in question is an ‘oppressor’ or not. They provided an example of senior citizens making inappropriate comments. ‘I would say it’s still worth telling the older person… it depends, there are many contexts. There are also battles you want to choose to fight,’ Prof. Menon responded. She said that if it is a teacher, it must be immediately pointed out. If it is from someone they are not close to, she suggested that they can choose whether or not to act depending on the older person’s influence over them.  With parents or immediate relatives, she suggested confronting them differently or directly depending on the relationship. She added that if it is a direct boss, or someone having power over one’s employment, one must ‘figure out a way of raising it’, perhaps by approaching the HR department or invoking company policy. She stressed that one never has to take oppressive comments or behaviour out of sheer respect for the elderly. We are entitled to decide our own limits for these things. 

Concluding Remarks

Prof. Tare thanked Prof. Menon and invited Ms Rashmi Nanda from the ICC to deliver the vote of thanks. Ms Nanda expressed gratitude to Prof. Niveditha Menon; Institute leadership; the ICC teams from all four BITS campuses; the SWD technical support team; the internal members of the ICC and Dr M Kasturi, Principal, BBVP, external member of the ICC; and the audience. Prof. Barai concluded the session by thanking Prof. Menon.
The full video of the session is available here.